放不下“聪明”的执念?
Still Hung Up on Being 'Smart'?

"小时候我总觉得自己有些天赋的。但慢慢长大了，总看到朋友圈里光鲜亮丽。可我没有雄厚的家境，也没有出类拔萃的的学历和成绩，更没有夺人眼球的才艺。我总觉得自己像《山月记》那句——深怕自己本非美玉，故而不敢加以刻苦琢磨，却又半信自己是块美玉，故又不肯庸庸碌碌，与瓦砾为伍。"

"When I was young, I always felt I had some talent. But as I grew older, I kept seeing the glamorous lives of others on social media. I don't have a wealthy background, nor outstanding academic credentials, nor any eye-catching talents. I feel like that quote from 'The Moon Over the Mountain' — I fear I might not be jade at all, so I dare not polish myself too hard, yet I half-believe I am jade, so I refuse to live an ordinary life among mere stones."

"可我就是努力不起来啊。最近ADHD风很大，我怀疑自己是不是也是。我不专心、爱玩手机、爱拖延。我也曾试过番茄钟，也尝试逼自己去图书馆，但最后也不过一直在摸鱼。"

"But I just can't seem to put in the effort. There's been a lot of talk about ADHD lately, and I wonder if I might have it too. I can't focus, I'm always on my phone, and I procrastinate. I've tried the Pomodoro technique and forced myself to go to the library, but I end up just wasting time anyway."

"我一遍遍告诉自己，我很聪明，我可以变成特别好的自己，我会变得特别厉害。可是，有时候心里为什么不免还是会悄悄打着鼓怀疑，真的吗，我真的能吗？"

"I keep telling myself that I'm smart, that I can become a better version of myself, that I'll become really capable. But why does my heart still secretly drum with doubt, wondering: Is it true? Can I really do it?"

以上。留言说说你觉得这像你吗。

That's all. Leave a comment if you think this sounds like you.

不过啊，连季羡林老先生都写过："我始终不敢太用功读书，害怕用功读书之后才发现自己是个笨蛋。"

But you know, even the respected Scholar Ji Xianlin once wrote: "I never dared to study too hard, afraid that after all that effort I might discover I'm just a fool."

如果你真是一个大笨蛋！你就是一个大香蕉！那又怎么样呢？你会讨厌你现在的爱好吗？你觉得你未来没希望了吗？

So what if you really are a big fool! What if you're just a big banana! So what? Would you hate your current interests? Would you think there's no hope for your future?

如果你不信仰"天赋"、"聪明"、"高智商"，而是相信"努力也是一种能力"呢？你没有看到，很多ADHDer，很多读写障碍，其实连"用功学习"都难上加难。

What if instead of believing in "talent," "intelligence," and "high IQ," you believed that "the ability to work hard is itself a kind of ability"? You haven't noticed that for many people with ADHD and dyslexia, even "studying hard" is incredibly challenging.

如果你正好是ADHDer，其实更要恭喜你，因为你起码知道了问题所在，就可以找各种方法去解决了！有那么多关于ADHD的书、那么多资源、那么多那么多！

If you happen to be someone with ADHD, you should actually congratulate yourself, because at least you know what the issue is, and now you can find various ways to address it! There are so many books about ADHD, so many resources, so much of everything!

反观很多人，一辈子都不知道自己的症结在哪里。

In contrast, many people go their whole lives without knowing what their core issues are.

小学时读《萌芽》杂志，有一句话我至今记得，"不是因为看得到希望才去努力，是因为努力了，才能看得到结果"。

I remember a quote from "Sprout" magazine that I read in elementary school: "We don't work hard because we see hope; we see results because we worked hard."

可是，也别神化"努力念书"，用功很好，不用功，也没关系。"努力"其实也是优绩主义的逻辑。

However, don't mythologize "studying hard" either. Working hard is good, but not working hard is also okay. "Hard work" is itself part of the logic of meritocracy.

对了，山月记的那句，后面还有一段——其实任何人都是驯兽师，而那野兽，无非就是各人的性情而已。

Oh, and that quote from "The Moon Over the Mountain" has a continuation — in fact, everyone is a beast tamer, and that beast is nothing more than each person's own nature.